John from the UK, April 2017, Tallinn

Paul,
We are all back from Tallinn, safe and sound if not entirely fit and healthy. We located Tez, the magic horse has spoken and I wanted to pass on some feedback for you. Please feel free to pass this on to your suppliers in Tallinn and use for publicity purposes if you require.

Krista
Krista was exceptional throughout. Once the lads had put their eyes back in their sockets and picked their tongues up off the floor (Ben aside) she took time to get to know everyone, put them at ease and make sure they were all having a good time.

No doubt she gets many compliments on her looks but more importantly she was a lovely, friendly, fun person who made the night for us.

She joined in all the banter and jokes, explained tea bagging to Chris and dealt expertly with all the drunken advances thrown her way. Not only did she recommend a great nightclub for us, she got us VIP access and partied with us until 4am introducing us to all her friends and even her mum! (If Chris can have Krista’s mum’s number that would be appreciated).

That said there are some constructive points we would like to note:
· She is attrotious at pool
· She needs to improve her AV equipment operating skills (see below)
· She did her best to make me sick throughout the night
· She is only a passible singer
· She was unable to locate the ginger Guinea pig

If she is able address these minor points, we recommend her for a pay revue and consideration for promotion to Guilford Tour Guide.

I also asked the lads for some feedback comments, here is a selection that are shareable:

Stu
‘’Wow’’
‘’Two great aspects to her personality’’

Chris
‘Christa had a wealth of knowledge that she employed to good effect to make the event informative, fun and of good value. She used her personality and charm to good effect maintain high morale throughout the whole group for the whole time.

I would highly recommend her to anyone visiting the area. She also had a great xxx redacted xxx. I am also sure the whole group will be dining out on the thought of her and her mum in the coming months. I for one stand behind the fact that the dolphin blowhole beats the horse on this occasion.’’

Tez
‘’8 on 10, Minor criticism – could improve skills in operating a ghetto blaster in the in the pre-stripper segment. But I’m nit-picking.’

Richard (stag)
‘Disappointing. When faced with a simple yellow to the left centre pocket, Krista opted to take on the altogether more challenging yellow to the far corner, and made a Horlicks of it. In terms of positives, I would happily xx redacted xxxx’’’

Ben
‘I actually nearly pissed myself’’

Other points

Meal
The meal was fine. I wasn’t in state to sample much to be honest, but I’m told it was quite acceptable and there were no issues. Turns out pancakes and Ice cream is an ideal hang over cure.

Meal Strippers
Also fine and gave a good show with the stag. If anything though, they were not as attractive as the rest of the women in Estonia.

Bar Crawl
Well organised, good places to go. Adapted to suit our needs as required. There was one place we went, can’t remember the name though, Route something…

Strip Club
Ok, no problems but we were having a much better time in the bars and clubs with Krista so didn’t stay very long. Same issue as above, in that there is more fun to be had without paying for it….

Club
Really quality nightclub (Club Theatre). Crazy expensive drinks but we didn’t care by that point. Good music, fun crowd, great time had by all (apart form the stag who send his apologies to the cleaners)

Overall
Extremely happy, will recommend to all.

John Hughes